THIS MEANS YOU, JODY!

Don’t marry lawyers. From a general health and well-being perspective, most, if not nearly all, are severely compromised. This is because lawyers like to drink. A lot. I can’t hang with these people, and with my thirties within striking distance, I don’t even want to. Our last happy hour stretched from 5:00 to 2:30 in the morning; most notably, Very Important Partner slogged his way to the bitter end. As a general matter, it’s not possible to drink your paycheck in one sitting, but if you have a dozen or so of your best work buddies with you, anything’s possible (especially if it’s not actually your paycheck, but the firm’s summer recruitment fund). As things were winding down, Very Important Partner tried to order one for the road, but was too impaired to speak. I’m astounded that he made it home safely. The incident definitely calls to mind a friend. Perhaps we can organize an inaugural one-on-one DUI Chicago—Distant Suburb drag race one of these days.