Good luck with that.

"That's what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age. "

If you’re vain and have tied your self-regard to the way you’re perceived by the opposite sex, a woman’s mid to late twenties must be a soul-crushing experience. There’s a lady in my building who works for another firm, but went to my law school. I met her in 1999, when she was probably 22. She had a tight ass. It was one of my favorite things about 1L year. Fast forward to 2005, and I can safely say that she is not keeping her shit together. At all. It’s as if someone took her, stuck her in a dimly lit crawl-space, force fed her nothing but restaurant food and liquor, and bent her over for a (metaphorical) work-schedule butt raping for the last three years. Think fat and pasty. Ha. When I met her, she was twice as hot as me. How far the mighty have fallen. And she’s not married, either. So to all of my female friends on the cusp of the latter half of their twenties—cheers!